Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

The "system" aka the Government

There is one less little boy at our house. He was supposed to come with his brother only for Thanksgiving. But he stayed until January 29th. And we LOVED every minute of it!

We really miss him.

But the County was incredibly excited to get him into the first ever home for severely Autistic children in the State, with his brother. There will be 12 severely Autistic children living there.

This group home was developed and partially funded by a Dr/mom who could not find a "home" for her severely Autistic son. No he did not live with her. (yes I'm curious as to why) The County is giddy with glee to make this "new" Group Home work.

In an age where the Government is currently insisting on implementing "person centered living" for adults with disabilities. Threatening to close their "sheltered workshops" or DACs as we call them because they are to now be surrounded and supported by non-paid staff at every opportunity. These children will not be living "person centered lives".
And try telling MA and SP that they can no longer attend the Whitney Senior program for elderly adults with disabilities (MA) or their (SP's) only hope for earning money, her DAC is shutting down. They are 59 and 60 years old. They are expected to attend anything they want with the community (un-paid staff) fully supporting them. What a mess. They don't want this change.

We are supposed to give MA and SP "exactly" the life they want. (yes the State quibbles over the definitions of the meanings of words like "exactly"! OY!)
But we do this already for them and have made their wishes our goal to provide them. Now it's a law. We are mandated to do so. Seems redundant.

CC is a child but he longer has a family.
Yes he has Autism, he wears depends, he is non-verbal, he has challenging aggressive behaviors.

But he can function in a family.
He was learning how here and we were amazed.

He loved having a strong father figure in Tom.
Yes he hit, but he was learning not to hit here. Because he was learning how to socialize.
Our frustration is with those who do not understand him.
Where are his rights?

School made us bring him home if he hit or made himself vomit. Seriously? That's his disability.

Most times he did those things just to leave school and come home. If they have the patience he would learn not to.

His para at school is a tiny little woman. CC does not respect women. He's 13, he has never learned how.

Poor CC who has not attended or received consistent schooling of any kind in 13 years needs public school, so why send him home??
We asked the County- we asked the school- doesn't he have any Educational Rights? He needs to be in public school. He does not need to come home!!!! He needs the supervision of public school to learn these social skills!!

 We miss him dearly. But the law states he has to be with his brother TA. Which seems so unfair because his 6 other siblings do not have to and of course can't because they do not have Autism.
We would support him if they would place in another family. We would take him as respite any time.
This way we'll never see him again.

Their minds are made up.

He is lost in the "system" now.

He'll imitate what he lives with and it will be 12 other severely Autistic children, with paid staff.
No "person centered" planning for a child like CC.
He'll grow stronger and more aggressive.

He'll always be in our prayers.
We thank God for him, he is an amazing little survivor.


  1. I'm so glad that he at least now has you advocating for him through prayer. But I'm sorry for all the losses you describe.

  2. I am so grateful that he had that time with you the last few months. That God brought him into your lives for a reason and that is so now you can know him and pray for him the rest of your lives. He sounds amazing. Very teachable. We are not always happy with the system either. Such unlogical decisions are made all the time. We just have to shake our heads and keep praying and advocating. So sorry for your loss of him in your home. I am sure he will be so missed. Blessings.

  3. I'm so sorry. I know this is hard on you. I bet you've seen a lot of changes in the system over the years. I'll be praying for you and CC as well.


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