Tuesday, July 9, 2013
JOY!! JOY!! JOY!! The door God opened!!
There was a mom and dad who desperately wanted to go back to BG to find their daughter. The dad especially had such a strong LOVE for the children from this Country after 4 trips there and back, seeing them, touching them.
On the dad's first trip a little girl caught his eye and smiled at him. She was beautiful!! She stole his heart. For another 18 months it was all he could think about. He wanted her.
The mom wasn't so sure. Five boys are a HUGE blessing! But dad convinced her. So they asked- they begged- they prayed- they pleaded. The dad even asked the Attorney in that Country, the one who completed the boy's adoptions. The answer was still no. They quickly found out that people they thought were friends were only internet connections- vapor in the wind. But God had used these connections regardless!!
Now with their five precious boys home. A feat only completed for them by God. Maybe now someone would help them adopt a little girl in BG?? What had they done wrong?
So they started their homestudy immediately in September, a week after the last 3 boys arrived. Their agency was completely supportive. Surely God would help them find a way to BG to find their daughter!
But then their agency here, told them that FL had a baby girl with DS due in November. The agency would choose us to adopt her, if we wanted her! We were in shock! Was it real? Was it true? They were over the moon happy! We thanked God for His Infinite Wisdom! We sent them every penny we had.
November finally came with its own hardships. satan never sleeps.
We waited for the call. The agency never told us that the baby was born and she did not have DS. The agency "sold" her to another family as a non-disabled child. Even though her birthmother had done drugs and alcohol and had a history of MI. I'm sorry- but if you can get more $$ for a baby this way- that is selling.
Crushed, devastated, grieving, cannot even begin to describe our loss.
We told our agency we had been so filled with so much JOY with our 5 boys and now we were struggling. We would need to take a break. We had to grieve our loss. We could not proceed without our JOY!
There were so many struggles from November to February. Heart ache, rebellious adult children, a teen turning 18 on meds that were causing horrible side effects. MA's first pneumonia. Trial after trial.
Our adoption worker here was quitting, she was pregnant with her 3rd child. We were so sad to lose her. She was/is amazing! Her gift to us was completing our Home Study before she left in February. We weren't even expecting that!! We were looking to finish in March.
Our new adoption Social Worker came out. She is equally amazing! We loved her from day 1!! God has truly truly blessed us! With her insight we felt confident to move forward!! God is SO GOOD!!
Mid March our new Social Worker called us about an adoption disruption in Iowa. A little girl 5 years old. Sotos Syndrome. I don't even know how to write much more about that call without crying tears of JOY! and then I can't "see" the keyboard! LOL!!
Was this her? Did God just open a door? Reading her history there were so many little things that made us sure she was ours. Her birthday is the same exact day as Pauly's. They are the exact same age! LOL!! That day is also the same birthday as our daughter JOY we adopted in 1988. Joy was our 2nd adoption. She had DS and was born without nasal passages. She died after surgery at 5 months. We were crushed- each adoption since we prayed for another daughter with DS. It was not to be.
But Bella Mercy and each child after Joy was!
Immediately I joined the Sostos Syndrome Association, the Sotos Yahoo group, miraculously the Sotos Conference was scheduled HERE!! This July!! I learned everything about Sotos I could get my hands on.
She had behaviors. The disrupting family was also a large family, close in age to us and very very experienced. So if they and several other families who visited her, could not tolerate these behaviors- could we??
Each behavior listed made me laugh- "Oh my! That's my Jakie!" "oh! yes Julius does that!" "Seriously?? all 5 boys are on her level! LOL!!"
I begged for visits to start the very next week! And we continued weekly visits until we could start 30 day visits.
But I wondered- how would you act if you were 5 yrs old, non verbal and significantly delayed and several members of your birth family had rejected you? How should you act? And the family she lived with 9 months had been searching for a home for you for 8 months? She went on visits with other families and was rejected. She grew to love many of these people. I could not imagine her pain.
Thinking of her pain is heartbreaking. From that she learned to use her behaviors to distance herself from everyone. She thought she had the power to cause us to reject her too. But she didn't know us! LOL! We even LOVE people who hate us!! LOL!!
Oh my precious baby- you had learned a lie. God LOVES you so much He gave His only Son to die on a cross for our/your sins. You were fearfully and wonderfully made! You are SO LOVED!!
You are HOME!!
Will you PRAISE God with us as we celebrate TODAY! gaining FULL CUSTODY! of our precious gift from God!!
PLEASE! pray that our state will allow her to stay here now. They might have her cross the Iowa border and sit in a hotel with Daddy until our state says she can move/live here!! That darn ICPC stuff! :o)