Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Friday, June 28, 2013

Because you ALL mean so much to us- we Thank God for you!

This is MA home with "her" kids.
Home at last!
These are our 4 oldest at home. (Samson has a bad cold and is in bed)
This is my Faith Blessing-12, Elizabeth Beloved- 11, Katherine Devoted- 10, Isaiah Michael- 9.
These 4 are my very best helpers , without these precious 4- I'm lost.
Can you see God's LOVE shine through their eyes!
MA adores them. Just as she adores the boys. She calls the boys our babies!

MA is left handed. Here she is feeling behind her to "pinch" one of the kids teasingly! She is so much fun!
She is wearing her Shiloh Shepherd T shirt. We have a white Shiloh Shepherd named Snow. She loves him. She saw I had a Tshirt with Shiloh Shepherds on- she made me buy her one too!

Every day we are together is a gift from our Heavenly Father, filled with so much JOY.
MA is JOY!
The boys are JOY!
These 4 beautiful children are JOY!
Serving each other in LOVE is JOY!

Our cup over flows! Each day a gift!

God Bless you ALL for loving our MA with us! For praying for her. For praying for us.
We LOVE you dearly!

Sunday, June 16, 2013

You are not alone!

Often I read blogs of precious adoptive moms who are doing a fantastic job............................
                                    but struggling.

Just to let you know- my LOVE for the boys is great. But I struggle too.

Some days I struggle with-
this precious boy. Will he ever heal from 7 years of wounds that no one can imagine? Abuse that makes no sense. Will he ever hug me or call me mom, or even look to me as mom? Right now I fulfill all his basic needs. These basic needs mean everything to him, his survival had depended on being desperate to have those needs met for 7 years. If I hold the bowl with his food near him, he can't even look at me, all he can do is whimper for food. I can't use food as incentive for him to sign or talk to me, because he can't wait for the thing he was desperate for most- to be fed.
Will he ever realize that I'm not mean- I'm teaching him life skills that he desperately needs for his future. Some days it feels like there will never be enough time to catch up.
And this boy.........................
will he ever learn that being oppositional will make life harder for him, not easier. That doing nice things is more rewarding than asking for attention by doing the wrong thing. His fight or flight responses when he's in trouble are ever on the ready. I hoped he'd learn more trust. He melts in my arms, he's truly a mommas boy. (who refuses to say mamma unless I'm not in the room) LOL! He is signing mamma- only he signs it from his mouth not his chin- which does describe me well- I'm the one who makes the food! :o)
Out of all 5 boys he has the highest IQ. But then I've always said- IQ means nothing if you aren't willing to work your hardest at what you need to do.
Or this boy................
who is so far behind everybody at 8 years old. How do we catch up. How can he understand that eating is good. That we only feed him because we love him, and we promised him he'd never skip a meal. And we are the only ones who "expect" him to do great things as others treat him as a baby. Some days we wonder- what can we expect him to do in the future?
Or this boy..............
who fights eye contact and lives in his own little world. Only coming out to interact with us if we beg him. Calling his name over and over with LOVE in our voices. He smiles at us, and as quickly as he heard us he leaves us again. His favorite thing in the whole world is to be tickled- so we do! Every so often out of the blue he'll laugh so joyfully you wonder- is he happy- does he feel LOVED? He doesn't have a favorite person here. He'll walk to any stranger and then complain loudly because he really doesn't want to be with them. He knows who we are- he just doesn't know how to come back to us............:o(
Or this boy- who LOVES, soaks in lots of new information, and has a healthy curiosity. Will he bond to us? Will he ever talk? Or communicate to us? He LOVES everybody- even strangers. How do I tell him not to hug people we don't know, or tell the strangers not to hug him because he needs to bond with me? I don't, I let him soak up LOVE anywhere he chooses. I can't deprive him. Will he ever walk? Will he always seek to be totally dependent on others because that's all he knew?

Is it because there are 5 of them? That I often feel easily defeated by the tiny strides we make. Should we have adopted only one boy to concentrate on fully?
No I don't think so. Our purpose for adopting was to save lives.
But when I struggle these are very human/real things I think about.

They are tools satan uses to confuse me, and tear away at the LOVE we have for each boy. Sometimes I catch my struggles quickly and tell myself I'm thinking foolishly. Other times I don't catch these thoughts and I let them settle in my mind, seeping in slowly and stealing the JOY I know I have.

2Cor 10:5We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
Oh! Precious Lord help me to remember the verses that sustain our JOY! They are lifesavers!
Thank You Lord- for your LIVING Word!!
(((HUGS))) to all you Mommas! You are incredible!

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Weary hearts

What is the hardest part of MA being sick?

Her family who only saw her 1-3X a year hates us. Yes hate is a strong word, but after 26 years it has increased not decreased.

Today was no exception. The verbal beating was painful.
Praise God!! He gave me this Psalm tonight, He attended my wounds.

Life is Short
39 I said, “I will be careful how I act
    and will not sin by what I say.
I will be careful what I say
    around wicked people.”
So I kept very quiet.
    I didn’t even say anything good,
    but I became even more upset.
I became very angry inside,
    and as I thought about it, my anger burned.
    So I spoke:
Lord, tell me when the end will come
    and how long I will live.
    Let me know how long I have.
You have given me only a short life;
    my lifetime is like nothing to you.
    Everyone’s life is only a breath. Selah
People are like shadows moving about.
    All their work is for nothing;
    they collect things but don’t know who will get them.
“So, Lord, what hope do I have?
    You are my hope.
Save me from all my sins.
    Don’t let wicked fools make fun of me.
I am quiet; I do not open my mouth,
    because you are the one who has done this.
10 Quit punishing me;
    your beating is about to kill me.
11 You correct and punish people for their sins;
    like a moth, you destroy what they love.
    Everyone’s life is only a breath. Selah
12 Lord, hear my prayer,
    and listen to my cry.
    Do not ignore my tears.
I am like a visitor with you.
    Like my ancestors, I’m only here a short time.
13 Leave me alone so I can be happy
    before I leave and am no more.” (NCV)
I thought I'd share in case you too need comfort from this kind of trial.
If anyone would like to know how MA is doing you can contact me.
My blog profile on the right side has my contact e-mail.

Some have said my e-mail link doesn't work! I checked it, it worked for me and it is correct.
here it is in case- tarcher30 at charter dot net

Monday, June 3, 2013

MA still very very sick/ and teaching special children how to feed themselves!

MA is still very very sick. PLEASE!! continue to pray.

Today I heard about a 41 year old woman with DS who was "diagnosed" with oppositional defiance disorder. I thought it was a bit much- we are a society diagnosing everything now-a-days! And I laughed! My Julius is hyperactive. But I would never diagnose him as ADHD. He has been "diagnosed" enough! People pre-judge when we hear a diagnosis. We can't help it, some of us don't get it, and us who do imagine how it might present. We judge what we know. So I judge DS. And I judge it something I LOVE- everything else that comes with it just is- just what it is! :o)
My very humble opinion!

So- feeding little boys who don't understand that it is a good thing!
I have wracked my brain with Noah, Jacob and Pauly. They have no interest in self feeding. (Julius is feeding himself, Mosie we will have to wait and see yet, his hand is too tiny for a spoon and he still gags without chewing!)

And so it hit me. (Sorry no pictures our photographer spends 13 hours a day with MA at the hospital. I'll get one soon.) I place Noah on my lap with his back to me. I pull us both up to the table. And I hold his left hand on the bowl and the spoon in his right hand. And we hand over hand feed! This way he's not throwing his spoon and tipping his bowl!

Repetition makes this work. We see it with Jacob every day. We move his legs, arms etc in ways he should move them, repeatedly as he dresses etc. He can now (After 8 months) move his legs to walk as we let him lean back on us standing. You have to be patient. It takes time! But since I LOVE interacting with my boys it is more than fun for me! Bonding time! And better than feeding them, for them.

Noah gets such a kick out of eating this way. Jacob isn't sure, he is like a starving little bird. As the spoon comes to him, he sucks in air. He used to suck in air all times of the day to fill his tummy in the orphanage. Now he only does it if he's stressed about seeing his food and wanting it now! Pauly doesn't think this way of eating is much fun at all. But he goes along with it! He pouts and holds food in his cheeks to show his distaste in trying something new! Poor baby!

So in case anyone else finds this helpful I thought I'd share! :o)
Now I must get back to my LOVE MA.