Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Welcome!! Grab a cup of coffee and visit with us! We hope you enjoy our story! (((HUGS)))

Friday, May 20, 2011

Keeping it real

Our HomeStudy is now another year older. That means we need to update medicals, John Walsh background checks and sign many releases.(8 for $70.00 each) For a family our size that it is alot. We have Dr appts again for 11 people. Fingerprints for Hope even tho she anticipates moving before our old HS expires. We also have to have another home visit. We paid $7,000.00 for this homestudy and each update is another $350.00. When the boys come home they will charge for post placement visits too.

We have had sooooooo many changes since we started our HS. First we were only doing a US adoption. After all we knew nothing about International adoption. Then we switched to International. Our first SW was fired! Two of our biggest helpers (our kids Grace and Matthew) and biggest supporters of our adoption moved out to start their own lives. Now we have less help. Next we have Hope who will be 18 in June who was planning to fly with Tom to get the boys, is moving out. She has a job and she shouldn't be expected to put her life on hold for her brothers and us. The youngest kids were 5,6,7 and 8 when we started. Now they are 7,8,9 and 10! Gabe and Samson were 14, now they are 16. Tom and I aren't getting any younger.

In June I also have licensing for our group home with the County and the State. Each audit my files and the County checks the house too. Plus I am writing a Referral for Proposal for the County, where I literally ask them if I can keep working with my ladies. I have to write up many pages explaining our "program" (group home). It is intensive and maddening. I send proofs of insurance, licensing and tax statements showing we are not in trouble with the IRS. I make 6 copies, one for each board member. UGH!! On top of those 3 things it is also MA's annual review. I have a new paid employee helping me complete the paperwork for that. But since she is new I am doing most of it.

Can I say...............HELP!! here??...........................

And I homeschool. And I have a house to maintain. I'm past being overwhelmed right now. My group home gals want vacation time soon and it's like, well, maybe next summer???!! But I can't do that to them.

In the meantime all of our AMAZING supporters of our adoption are losing their supportiveness. I don't blame them. This is taking a long time and they just can't see the end to it anymore. They are frustrated and we are frustrated. They want to help but there's nothing to help with other than funding. The boys are becoming less real to them.

It feels like we are not the same family as we were two years ago starting the homestudy. It really makes things harder. We have to re-invent who we are each time we lose an older child to their independence. Gabe is the oldest here now at 16. By the time the last 3 boys get home he'll probably be on his own too. We are going to have to hire a PCA. We've rarely done that since having strangers in your house isn't always fun!

MA's Alzheimer's does not slow down. We could lose her in the midst of this.

Some days it's just too overwhelming to think about.

Could it be August now??


  1. Elizabeth- I pulled the laptop up on the kitchen counter (outside the now "not-so-safe" zone!) for the sole purpose of checking to see how you are doing. I wonder every day, how, how, how you do it all..how you will do it with more. Sometimes I feel pretty bogged down with the endless chores and work needed...there simply isn't enough hands to keep things moving the way they should. I hurt for you that you also struggle with it all at times..wish I were closer to help although at this point, not sure I could do much given how busy these boys are keeping me!! But, I'm so glad you share the "real" so I can at least pray that He gives you the endurance to continue each day with as much joy there as you share with so many others. So, prayers today for you friend!! Jennifer

  2. I wish I could fly up there, even for a weekend, and you could kick me into gear wherever you needed me. Friend, you know satan doesn't want your focus where it needs to be. he LOVES to overwhelm me.

    Yet, in this I see your beautiful boys (still want to just pick them up and cuddle them), a fantastic family (perfection is for God only :)), and service to your Father.

    Looking at everything you listed, everything ties to service to God...even in letting kids grow up to serve God themselves. satan is trying to hide your light under that proverbial bushel of chaos, but somehow you seem to let it shine through.

    Long distance hugs and many prayers!!!!

  3. AMEN!!! Kat! Perfection is for God only!

    Thanks Kat & Jennifer for your encouraging words at a time when giving up sounds good.

    I want to hug my boys too. ALL 5 of them. Group hug!! :o)


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